Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Eyebrows, there should be two of them

To say I have been neglecting my appearance would kind of be the understatement of the year. There are a few ways that I have kept up with the basics.
  • nails - I have a nail file and clippers at work. So surprisingly they are a decent length and I am able to keep them from getting chips and breaks and shit. Toes - I loves me a pedicure and I seem to be able to manage that with a baby. Jack will either sit on my lap, or chill in his carseat and flirt with the ladies while my claws get tamed.

  • eyebrows - um yeah, so I realized about a week ago that these were getting bad and do to baby-related constraints I have had to tackle the beast over a few days. Basically in the 45 seconds I have before I need to be out the door for work, I try to locate and erraticate the most offensive eyebrow hairs. I can happily say after a few mornings of this, I am about half way there! So in another week these monsters should be under control.

  • unwanted hair - um who am I kidding, the vajayjay is out of control! does anyone have a weed wacker? I am lucky if I remember I have armpits once a week. Often times when I realize and lift up the arm in the shower it is like a crazy surprise 'wow! how does hair grow that fast?' The legs I attack at about the same pace as my eyebrows. Is anyone able to take more than a 50 second shower? I miss those days. Usually it is like "concentrate on the shins". I am not sure where this tactic came from, but it has become some sort of unspoken rule (with myself obvi) that having shaved shins is the most important part.

  • hair - um I pretty much do the same thing to it every day. sigh. I swear I used to be at least a fraction of a percent girlier than I am right now.

  • clothes - just fucking give up on life now, why don't ya. My clothes are so sad. So very very sad. And it isn't that I don't have cute clothes...I do. It is just that I have gotten in this rut where I have seven or eight outfits that are easily located and put together and I stick with those.
Basically I need to step up my game. The good news is my oral hygiene is immaculate. Holla for an awesome dental appointment!!!....Is it sad that I have gotten to the age when it is exciting to get a 'your teeth look great!' from a dentist? I guess I am just excited to know that I can take care of something on my person well.

12 comments:

  1. LOL...weed wacker. I think we all get to this point sometimes, baby or not. You aren't alone. I would expect your armpits to be shaved by next week tho.

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  2. Pull everything out of your closet... only put back in the clothes you actually want to wear again, and since things go back in a different order, you'll rediscover old outfits you loved!

    My toenails are bare b/c it required all my effort and grunting to get the old polish off and I'm too cheap to get a pedicure. *sigh*

    Good luck with those eyebrows - there should definitely be two of them. :)

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  3. I feel ya!!! I don't know how anyone has the time to shave, pluck or god forbid wax! I am lucky to get a shower before 9 or 10 at night, much less groom. Good thing my husband and I are too tired to do anything remotely sexy. I may scare him away if we did!

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  4. I'm all about the shaved shins!! I need a pedicure like it's nobody's business. I get my nails and eyebrows done (not often enough), but otherwise I'm with you on every single point. :)

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  5. You crack me up! I can relate to all of this and spent a good 30 minutes grooming last night before my anniversary bedroom session. Felt like I should at least trim up a bit for the special occasion. Otherwise Josh might have gotten lost! Yikes.

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  6. I suspect the girls are going to want you to pay a little attention to some of your "special places" before the trip. :) I hear ya about thing getting away from you though. I never realize how bad my eyebrows have gotten until I get them done and then it's like a lightbulb goes off about how bad they were.

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  7. I am like a gorilla girl now that Im preggs. I was hairy to begin with, but now with all the hormones and stuff, I can't keep up with all the hair! So gross!! Guess it's just prepping me for when he baby arrives and my razor gets rusty ;)

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  8. Wait, you have time to shave your shins? Teach me your ways....

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  9. OMG I am in the same boat but worse....my toes look horrible, my brows are bushy, and my legs...well forget about it! I feel so bad for my husband but hey - he doesn't shave his face every day so I'm not shaving my legs every month. That's fair, right?

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  10. You say this on a day that despite a) it's raining and b) i haven't shaved my legs since my iui 11 days ago, I am still wearing capri pants. Score one for the woolly mammoths of the world!

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  11. I had to do an hour "spa" treatment on myself the other day before my surgery....There was just way too much going on to tackle bit at a time. I needed a full-on attack, black-ops style to get my junk in order. Seriously.

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