Saturday, January 8, 2011

Leaving Denial-Land

So I guess it is time, time to give up on the hopes that vets don't know anything about reading x-rays and making diagnoses. The vet called and confirmed the original diagnosis of bone cancer. Andy and I both didn't really talk or discuss it when we found out. I think we were still fully willing to not face the issue. But it has been slowly sneaking into both our minds. 
Yesterday after work Andy and I rode the bus up to CU Boulder so Andy could get his student ID and we could go get his textbooks....$600 later, ouch! Textbooks have always been ridiculous and turns out, they still are. We walked around and found all his classrooms so that he would have more of an idea of where to go on Monday morning. I think he is a little nervous about the size of the campus and the potential size of the classes. It seems like almost all of his classes will be large lectures. I think he'll be just fine. But with all that activity I was able to suppress the issue even more. 
Last night it finally started to hit me. When I crawled into bed with Lincoln....yeah like I am going to enforce that rule anymore...he laid his head on my belly and looked up into my eyes. I was a goner. I tried to think about the positives. He seems to be getting around pretty well still and acting happy. But I couldn't help wondering how much longer it would be. And as dorky as it sounds, I am pretty broke up about the fact that Nugget won't get to know Lincoln. That I won't get any pictures of them snuggled together. 
Bah, anyway, I am waiting for my dad to pick me up to head down to Raton. Hopefully the weekend with my family will be just what I need. Little kids are always a good distraction and of course, crazy grandma is good for some laughs. 

4 comments:

  1. Bleh....

    Crap.

    That sucks ass, Natalie. I'm sorry. :(

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  2. :( I'm so sorry, Natalie. That sucks.

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  3. That really stinks. So sorry....

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  4. Oh this is making me so sad. I can't imagine losing one of our pups, they are our kids, so I totally understand. Just love on him as much as you can.

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